Two brothers, once inseparable, now irreconcilable, brawl and bumble over the most beautiful woman in town. Caffrey – thief and local celebrity – needs a trophy wife to complete his delusional picture of himself; Mel – faithless monk and pained introvert – needs a goddess to replace his lost god. What they don’t know is that the object of their desires, Nuala Macree, is a ferocious eco-activist focused on a plot to teach ‘the man’ a lesson he’ll never forget. We are in Lochard, a fictional town outside Dublin, following the lustful rise and bloody fall of Caffrey’s courting, the pathos and hilarity of Mel’s bungling, and Nuala’s tooth-cracking anger at the gall of the French guy with the pout. In the context of a small town full of colorful personalities, the melee of the lovesick brothers, the haughty Nuala and some Irish rain, leads to a riotous climax.